Donald Rumsfeld's voodoo doll looked like just him, except it was ten inches tall. It resembled the devil himself, and exuded a faint yet distinct sour smell. When the socially progressive Green party advocate punctured its effigial lungs, Donald coughed slightly and grasped his chest. When the socially progressive Green party advocate rotated its effigial right ankle 360°, Donald did a sudden dance neither he nor the Cabinet understood. It resembled some African-American urban street thing, and he apologized profusely.
This was all dissenter fun until the socially progressive Green party advocate's nephew stole the voodoo doll and used it to skull fuck his sister's Barbie doll. As it is illegal to skull fuck a person, Donald, who was keen on complicated metaphors, skull fucked small countries instead. This went on for years, until he noticed metaphorical chafing, negotiated an unprecedented severance package, and resigned.
The spectrum of American politics was a rather long segment with two end points that moved further and further apart as people became more desperate and irrational. States were assigned colors, just like races. Everyone was a little indignant; sentiments were presented comprehensively on CNN and AM talk radio. People covered their car bumpers with rhetorical sayings and got their middle fingers ready.
The socially progressive Green party advocate's indignation toward Donald Rumsfeld became more uncontrollable as the wheatgrass shots went on. Every time she saw a SUPPORT OUR TROOPS bumper sticker, she stuck cactus needles into the voodoo doll's urethra, which was problematic while driving. The throbbing pulse in her temple muted out the world outside.
Donald Rumsfeld developed scarring tissue in his urethra. Urination became very painful. He recoiled every time he saw a liter bottle of Pellegrino. He grew to fully understand the meaning of 'pissed off.' Every time Richard B. Cheney said, 'I'm fucking pissed off here,' Donald replied, 'You don't know what you're talking about, seriously.'
America is called 'beautiful country' in Chinese, so when Weihong Zhu talked about America to her friends during break, she said 'beautiful country' over and over again. She imagined a sunrise over wheat fields and blond children with perfect navels. The other girls smiled, and imagined these things also. When the siren rang, Weihong and her friends went back to work. The factory cast a green light over 10,000 heads. Dusk was arriving, but there was still more work to do. Their job was to find Barbie dolls with imperfect faces, and remove the heads.
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